I'm really getting tired of shit!

my mom is getting crazier....I'm getting crazier...quietly!
I kinda need to get out of here....FUCK THIS!!! Seriously!

Why am I still here? I'm so sick....i'm trying to be ok...really....really ok! I'm so quiet right now...about feeling crazy....I'm screaming loud inside my god damn head all the time though!

A WEEK LEFT!

it feels so far away yet so close....

I want to be gone but I know...i will miss some things here...I just feel like it would be best If I was gone

For myself...I hopefully will sit for once in my life and feel content and most of all safe!

Not not have my heart beating faster than normal all the time.

to feel healthy and loved. I'm so sad...at the moment...why am I crying...

I DONT CRY! I hate my mother...for many reasons that I can not say on my blog...I hate gigi for other things...

I hate my past...

I hate who I was..

I hate some people in my past

I hate hating me when I think about it...I kno i'm better than that! I really do

why cant my brain shut off sometimes instead of it just keep spinning around and around?

I'm sick right now. I feel like a have a wrench tightening my insides....

where...
who?
what?
why?

dont ask....really..Im FINE! REALLY! I'm just going to throw up all over my new computer!

how does this work again? the good thing?

I dont even know what that means

I'm going to set up my classes tonight! or tomorrow morning..im nervous and excited.... YAY!!!

im so happy but tired...

or health things...I'm trying to get photoshop to mork to work on colins photos!

YIKES!! Lucy called me crying...about me leaving her...

I cant believe im leaving....i just cant believe it...

Um....

Im in a very not so good mood...

im tired and annoyed at people that just need to go away.


THE END

So today was an ok day....

I went to see Kung Fu Panda with Nick and then we went out to dinner. It was really nice. We went into Pottery Barn and EQ3 and found some nice things for my apartment.

Val and I figured out everything for Vancouver trip....

she rented a huge truck U HALL thing and Nick, her and me are driving up there on the 6th of july! We'll get there late on the 7th...then we will buy things for my aparment and set everything up! until nicks dad fly's down....of lord...umm and helps him find a room on the 10th...or something...then apparently nicks mom is coming right when his dad leaves! hmmmm well we'll have like 2 days or 4 days of fun....bleehh..anyway I think this is going to be really fun! i think....

It's weird though...leaving everything...PLUS i havent heard from Lucy in a really long time and I dont know what her choice is. I really really really need to know..soon because I need to know if shes coming to set up the apartment...I'm worried...

anyway...on another note I am not looking forward off cleaning out wilton...that is the last time I will ever see wilton...my childhood house...its gone..

wow... its this Monday. UGH!


Oh OH ok...also Im getting a lot of new clothes and im hella happy about that..I got hella new pea coats today all these were on sale.. I need boots and other things too! I cant wait!! OMG im so excited!

Im leaving really soon...Im really happy about it...but right now im worried because im hurting a lot...bleehhh

I dont know whats going on...it kinda sucks..UGH!!! dude...

WHY IS THIS HAPPENING! Im tired of this shit!!!

anyway i really miss someone...nic kalish! where r u??? dude im crazy right now...dsljflajdaadj dodododododododododododododooo

wow...

right now im in a not so good mood...

thats all....

OH WAIT!!! im leaving in 2 weeks!!! IM MOVING! TO VANCOUVER!!! FUCK YES....i think! no i know....its going to be weird tho...no joke...hella weird...ugh....


im sad...

FUCK OFF